The Shy Person’s Guide to Online Dating

If you’re new to online dating, or if you’re simply shy and looking for ways to become more of a confident dater, this is for you! Here are some tips on how to start a conversation, how to prepare for a first date, and how to develop a thicker skin in the online dating world:

Icebreakers and getting the conversation started online

Chatting someone up online can be nerve-wracking, and some online daters might not know how to begin. A good way can be by commenting on someone’s profile picture. If they are pictured at a beach or a park, ask them where it is, or if they are holding a pet or have some food in front of them, ask open questions about it to spark their interest and to show your own interest in them. Another good idea is to start with common interests – an instant conversation starter. If you’re using a site such as www.eharmony.com, which has an app that highlights when you share common interests with your matches, this is made easy for you! So comment on your similar taste in music or film or your favorite sport and get started that way.

Getting from the phone to the offline date

It’s best to talk on the phone or over Skype a few times before meeting. That way, you can get to know them a little more, and you will feel safer going out on a date with them. Getting to that stage, though, means both of you feeling ready. If you don’t, don’t let the other person push you into it. However, if you do feel ready and they are showing interest in you, then what have you got to lose? Ditch your nerves and just pluck up the courage to suggest a meet. Simple as that!

Going out on the first date

The first date is always a stomach-fluttering affair, but there are some things you can do to calm your nerves and make you feel more at ease when you meet your date. Think of at least five reasons why he or she will like you. It’s easy to fall into the trap or being negative about yourself, but the more positive you are, the more confident you will appear! You could also call up a friend beforehand to get a pep talk, which will leave you feeling better about yourself. For more information on how to prepare for a first date, click here and you’ll find plenty of good dating advice.

How to develop a thicker skin

It can take a while to develop a thick skin in the online dating world, but like everything, it will come with experience. Remember not to take things personally – if you don’t get a second date with somebody, it’s not the end of the world. There are plenty of other people out there who will be compatible with you. Another important thing is to realize what you want and focus on your own mind. Then, if asked if you want to meet someone again, you will know to say yes or no. And if your answers differ, don’t get hung up about it and wonder why it didn’t work out. The fact is, it didn’t, so keep looking until you find someone who does like you for who you are, and who you want to say ‘yes’ to.